I Am the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: An Interview.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is rightfully celebrated as an action movie legend. However, during the peak of his blockbuster fame in the eighties and nineties, he also delivered several critically acclaimed comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35-year mark this December.

The Role and An Iconic Moment

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger portrays a hardened detective who poses as a schoolteacher to locate a fugitive. Throughout the story, the procedural element acts as a basic structure for Schwarzenegger to film humorous interactions with kids. The most unforgettable belongs to a little boy named Joseph, who unprompted stands up and informs the actor, “Males have a penis, females have a vagina.” The Terminator deadpans, “Thanks for the tip.”

The young actor was played by former young actor Miko Hughes. Beyond this role included a character arc on Full House playing the antagonist to the famous sisters and the character of the child who returns in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with multiple films listed on his IMDb. Additionally, he engages with fans at the con circuit. He recently shared his memories from the production over three decades on.

Behind the Scenes

Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I believe I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.

That's remarkable, I don't recall being four. Do you have any memories from that time?

Yeah, to a degree. They're flashes. They're like visual recollections.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would take me to auditions. Frequently it was an open call. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all just have to wait, be seen, be in there less than five minutes, deliver a quick line they wanted and that's all. My parents would help me learn the words and then, once I learned to read, that was the initial content I was reading.

Do you have an impression of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?

He was incredibly nice. He was fun. He was good-natured, which arguably makes sense. It would be strange if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a good work environment. He was great to work with.

“It would be strange if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I was aware he was a huge celebrity because that's what my parents told me, but I had barely seen his movies. I felt the importance — like, that's cool — but he didn't really intimidate me. He was just fun and I only wanted to hang out with him when he had time. He was busy, obviously, but he'd kind of play with us here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd show his strength and we'd be hanging off. He was incredibly giving. He gifted all the students in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was like an iPhone. This was the must-have gadget, that funky old yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It finally gave out. I also received a real silver whistle. He had the referee's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your days on set as being fun?

You know, it's funny, that movie is such a landmark. It was such a big movie, and it was such an amazing experience, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of working with Arnold, the legendary director, the location shoot, the production design, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. Like, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was brand new. That was the coolest toy, and I was quite skilled. I was the smallest kid and some of the older kids would hand me their devices to get past hard parts on games because I could do it, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all youthful anecdotes.

The Line

OK, the infamous quote, do you remember anything about it? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word shocking meant, but I realized it got a reaction and it caused the crew to chuckle. I understood it was kind of something I shouldn't normally say, but I was given approval in this case because it was funny.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it came about, based on what I was told, was they were still developing characters. A few scenes were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the entire ensemble assembled, it was more of a collaboration, but they refined it on set and, I suppose it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "We're thinking. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "I need to consider this, let me sleep on it" and took a day or two. She deliberated carefully. She said she had doubts, but she thought it will probably be one of the iconic quotes from the movie and her instinct was correct.